Boundaries

My loves! Peace and the love of Christ to you all ❤️

God has really stretched me for this post. I have been called to write it for some time now but it’s an area I struggle with at the highest level. So I was really asking God how would I be able to encourage people in an area I struggle with? How does someone who is always available to everyone create healthy boundaries ?

When I think about boundaries I immediately think about the fact that – to create a boundary that would involve me saying the word NO.

I had to realize that saying “no” didn’t make me a horrible person. After all when we were two / three it did become one of our favourite words. So how come when we became teenagers- adults we became afraid to use the word? Then I found this post from Grace Byers a while back:

The first time I said “No I don’t think I will be able to commit to that” or

“ No, I am not going to that event” or “No, I’m not available” – I. Freaked. Out. Why? Because I felt this authority that I’ve never felt before. You see I used to say no and follow up with an explanation. Are we really obligated to explain everything to everyone? That’s when boundaries are crossed. That’s when persons feel like they some what own a part of your life and your space.

I thought over and over I would disappoint people….but here’s the reality, I’m not superwoman and I needed to protect my space. I have my own things to deal with and in order to deal with them … I had to make time for myself! Right??

The more I grow in Jesus Christ , I realize that I can’t say yes to everything. Sometimes it will just have to be no. I have to be Spirit led with my no and stand by it. Not fall into the pressure trap or guilt cycle.

I struggled with this because I used to be a people pleaser. I love to help and people knew this. I can sit and listen to friends or family for hours only to offer the best advise I could. I love to plan and help out with everything and eventually this girl right here GOT TIRED. Sooooo I had to create a boundary for myself.

I also had to ask myself is my life centered around God? Or centred around pleasing people?

Have to allow people to cultivate their own relationship with Christ?

Everyone is responsible for their own lives and own salvation. I can’t make people grow fruit. I can’t work out someone else’s salvation

Philippians 2:12 says:

“Dear friends, you always followed my instructions when I was with you. And now that I am away, it is even more important. Work hard to show the results of your salvation, obeying God with deep reverence and fear.”

If your constantly busy with everyone else how do you make time for God? How do you find the time to study the Bible if you’re busy studying someone’s life?

How can the Holy spirit use you if you’re consistently exhausted?

Too exhausted to think? Or too exhausted to hear his voice? Or even too exhausted to simply feel His presence?

Was I constantly entertaining things pulling me away from Christ? ( including people, tv, music and things)

Once I created boundaries, I was set free. I actually had time to think and understand. I was able to grow my relationship with Jesus.

Now, with my healthy boundary I was able to have:

  1. A greater understanding of my Creator and source
  2. A greater understanding of self-love
  3. A greater understanding of my PURPOSE
  4. A greater understanding of self- acceptance and the importance of self-awareness and growth
  5. A greater understanding of true, unconditional love
  6. A greater understanding of the importance of family and friendships
  7. A greater understanding of letting go of thing that no longer serve or honour my purpose
  8. A greater understanding of my portion and sharing my blessings

I no longer conform to the “truths” of this world but to the truths of my Source.

Creating boundaries has made me free from the bondage of my past.

Don’t get me wrong. We are here to love and help each other as brothers and sisters in Christ…..but chose your battles and create healthy boundaries.

It simply allows you to B R E A T H E

Learn to be confident in your no. Ask the Holy Spirit about your yes.

What are some healthy God- led boundaries you create? Would love to hear from you!

lots of love,

The Graced Citizen ❤️

The Wait

Yes, the season of wait. The longest and hardest season period. Usually, the Holy Spirit shows us a promise and then we must wait for God’s timing.

But then our human nature kicks in, we want it now! God why would you show me this. No, I don’t want to fast and pray. You’re taking too long Jesus! * goes about and attempts to do it in our own will and might* —— completely fails ——- return to waiting on Jesus. Talk about impatience and spiritual disobedience!!

What a process! Reminds me of the children of Israel. Instead of waiting patiently – they complained, placed idols before God and tried to make things happen in their own time. Well, what could have been just a few days costed them 40 years of their lives!

The children of Israel walked in spiritual disobedience because they got impatient with God’s Promise.

When you walk in obedience, there is a commanded blessing over your life.

You should declare: ” I will not grow weary in my season of wait”

Exodus 14:14 says: “The Lord himself will fight for you. Just stay calm.”

That simply means God already has it figured out and we need to remain calm and obedient to our now.

It’s in the wait season that you grow. It’s in this season you learn moment to moment. You learn how to make something from nothing. It’s a valley of the unknown meaning we have to learn to lean on the ultimate maker- God himself. It’s in this season you learn to become strong. The wait season brings the best memories that moment when you reach to your breakthrough.

Isaiah 40:31 NKJV says: “But those who wait on the LORD Shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles, They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and not faint.”

Always remember there is a season after the wait season.

lots of love❤️

The Graced Citizen

The Unexpected

My sister and I recently completed “The Unexpected” by Christine Caine bible study on the Bible app.

Let me just say, this study has changed our lives drastically. Faith without works is definitely DEAD. (James 2:17-18)

The main focus of the study is having faith during the unexpected.

Christine reminds us that what is unexpected to us, isn’t unexpected to God and therefore we should activate our faith and KEEP GOING. When unexpected things happen, we mustn’t try to take things in control.

Us trying to have control means we lack faith! Think about it, us controlling things removes God as the author and controller of our lives! That is dangerous! That removes our fear of the Lord and His plans for us. We can’t be faithful and controlling at the same time.

She teaches in the study that we need to walk by faith, run to God and not to allow fear to consume our daily lives. Also, the fact that we can’t allow daily fears to derail us from our kingdom purpose!

You see loves, in order to grow, things around us MUST change. And believe me, trials are going to come during this unexpected change BUT we know the Bible says “all things are working for our good” – Romans 8:28 …. so that means even though trials arise- All things … not some things BUT ALL things are working for our good —- with that being said we should learn to rejoice no matter what because at the end of the day our God is STILL GOOD and always working.

I definitely recommend this study on the Bible app and you should start it with a friend so you can do the “Talk it Over”.

I will end with a excerpt from the study.

(All rights reserved to Christine Caine and the Bible app)

” Our part is to exercise faith and patience. Faith is believing God, believing that God is who he says he is, and that he will do what he said he would do. Patience is our capacity to tolerate delay—our ability to wait. It’s trusting that God is good, God does good, and God knows what he is doing, no matter how long it takes—no matter what our purpose is. 

We all are called to the unexpected, and it will always take faith to see it through—but when we move forward by faith, God will always fight for us and do the miraculous. Let’s recognize what God is doing for us, the doors he’s opening for us, the steps he’s ordering for us. Let’s recognize his supernatural power at work in our lives.

He will always honor our obedience. In everything God has called me to do, the miracles happened after I stepped out in faith—after I stepped out in obedience, trusting him. “

God bless you! I’ve missed you all so much😔 My computer has been down but I will try my best to share everything from my phone for the time being ( thanks to my dear Aqua for that extra push)

lots and lots of love,

Jesus loves you! Talk to you soon 💕

The Graced Citizen

Stay Single

Just a Reminder for the Single Ladies! There is no rush in waiting on God’s best. Don’t let the pressures of life or society make you get in a situationship

Discovering Your Happiness

Hello loves, ❤

Stay single until you find someone who you don’t mind taking care of when they’re sick or sad. Someone who doesn’t have to be in a good mood for you to enjoy their company. You should like your person, even when they’re feeling off. Even when they had a horrible day and you have to comfort them. Even when they don’t feel like going out and would rather snuggle in bed.

Stay single until you find someone who appreciates your effort. Someone who notices how much you have done for them and lets you know they are thankful for it. Someone who doesn’t let your hard work go unnoticed. Someone who makes sure you feel like you are being acknowledged, because they would never want you to feel used, like you are being taken for granted.

Stay single until you find someone who will match your effort. Someone…

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